Posts Tagged ‘Job Search’

Today it finally happened – Silver was repo’d – we’re back to square one – no vehicle – no transportation, no nothing.

We’ve been down this road before – once many years ago our Pontiac Vibe was Repo’d and we went five months without a vehicle – it was difficult and we had a very hard time finding work due to the lack of reliable transportation.  So now we’re trying to figure things out, slowly.  We’ve outlined a plan using my last two checks as a basis for the budget so we can ensure we have funds every month with some leftover for saving for a new vehicle.  We’re looking for something decent – and something we can pay cash for – last time we had a group helping us – this time we’re on our own.

I have also dictated to my husband that now we’re out of a vehicle we need to talk about replacing our washer/dryer so we can run laundry.  Ugh.

It’s become so overwhelming in the last couple of weeks – and its finally come to a head….

Wish us luck!

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So to Speak…

I have so much in my brain right now – I’ve discussed where we’re at with the Mortgage and the van – and we have that underway.

The mortgage is in a holding pattern until the funds from our 401K arrive via Fed-Ex after it’s sent – the NCHFA has told us that we’ll have the funds forgiven after 10 years in the home – I really hope that we’re successful in paying the mortgage ourselves after their support runs out after 18-Months.

However, today I received the paperwork FINALLY from Wells Fargo to close my account – I sent an email to the HR Team of my previous employer requesting they complete the paperwork and send it back to Wells Fargo as soon as they can so I can get this money quickly.  So now we wait…as per usual.

Bonus, though today we got a call from DSS telling us we qualify for Family/Adult Medicaid through the State so we can get medical insurance.  YAY! My husband has been experiencing random low grade to somewhat highish fevers and I am really worried about him – BUT we’ve been unable to get him to the Dr’s to get it looked at.  And, he’s been unwilling to go to the hospital to get it looked at, and I understand that, ER’s are not clinics and not the place to go for medical attention.  So tomorrow, off we go to DSS to get this application in.

I was told today that another manager in my store is looking for someone Full-Time in two of her departments – she’d already offered me extra shifts and I am going to take them – however, my counter manager told me to talk to this other manager about getting a full-time position with her.  I am considering it because we could definitely use the money, and its looking like my future is bound within the walls of the store…for now at least as I am having a very hard time finding work outside of the store. Been looking for a couple of months now with no luck…so yup.

I am also considering undertaking a change in our diet – recently one of my favorite author’s has started on her blog a series of posts about Depression Era Eating and cooking.  She’s listed those items to store in bulk and now I am thinking about how to outfit our kitchen to accommodate bulk dry goods in my kitchen. (her initial post is here, Food Frugality in the New Depression) – it’s a 12′ x 12′ square with one wall of cabinets interspersed with my stove, sink, and refrigerator

The other side of the cabinets is the same, and on the 3rd wall is a steel dog crate for Sadie.  So now I have to get creative, maybe using some shelves and the real estate on the floor by the other wall on the other side of the kitchen next to the living room…

I think doing this would allow us to save some money at the grocery store – just because we’re on Food Stamps doesn’t mean we have to eat like crud – we can use those funds to pay for bulk items at the store and eat well. At least that’s my thought…what do you all think? If nothing else the money saved will be helpful in paying for other items.

One is Silver – we’re considering selling her, as much as it breaks my heart – we cannot continue to pay her monthly payment, the insurance and gas – we’d need another vehicle so possibly going back to a buy here – pay here place OR buying something for cash.  We won’t get what we owe Regional for her – I am aware of that – BUT the bigger picture is that her monthly payment ($540.00) plus the insurance ($272.00/mos) plus gas ($140.00) is just too much for us right now on my $9.00/hr income…so we have to determine if that’s a viable option…

Ok I think I’ve offloaded enough…

And I am still VERY bitter…evidently.

Thought I’d put it all behind me then my previous employers’ outplacement company called this morning and I just about bit the poor woman’s head off…ugh…

She was trying to get me to do a one hour online Orientation Webinar and I literally just couldn’t wrap my head around sitting in front of the computer for an hour doing this webinar.  I did cruise through the website before I left the company and I was less than impressed – seems these days to find a job one has to become a Marketing Guru/Narcissist. Ugh.  For those of us who are more humble and unwilling to turn into a 20-Something Millennial, this is going to prove to be very difficult.  I am 37 yrs old, I have 18 years working experience under my belt doing all realms of administrative/clerical and some sales work, I have both a BA and an MBA, I truly don’t think I need to “brand” myself and become that which is driving the world to a higher rate of narcissism. That’s just not me.  I don’t need to become to web celebrity to secure a job. This is truly ridiculous.

She offered to review my resume and help with interview tips, which I’ll take.  BUT these days it’s not about finding a company that matches ones ideals and in turn finding that dream career, nope these days the job market is about matching your “brand” to a company.  It’s truly been reversed and its ridiculous.

Oh and don’t even get me started on that crap website LinkedIn…has anyone truly ever had any success navigating that website?  Or is it just me?  I can’t seem to make it work for me…they want you to put ALL of your skills, talents, certifications, licensure, etc. etc. etc. etc. out there and then invite your entire address book to “network” with you, it really is just FACEBOOK for your damn resume.

Seriously people, when did this turn of events and manner of job seeking happen?  What happened to putting your resume in for a job, the hiring manager reviewing it, and then the interview – seems the pre-interview happens BEFORE your resume even hits the hiring manager’s desk…

Can we tell I am so done with the Corporate world and its Shenanigans?  The company I dedicated 5 working years to just discarded me like a piece of trash because I didn’t agree with the path they were wanting to take for my position (no I don’t know this for sure, BUT I do know the BRAND NEW finance person for our division and I didn’t get along AT ALL).  So here I am 37 yrs old, competing for jobs I could do in my sleep with these narcissistic 20-something year old millennials who’ll do the job for 1/2 the cost I am willing to take.

If I could drop many F*Bombs here I would…

So tomorrow morning around 10am my replacement will be badged and on campus ready for training…

So tomorrow morning I have to begin showing this stranger how to do my job…

So tomorrow morning reality will truly truly settle in…

So tomorrow morning I am going to be doing this UN-MEDICATED…

So tomorrow morning I may puke…

Will someone be there to help pick up the pieces…I highly doubt it…my only saving grace is that I’m leaving work around 2:30 tomorrow to take our daughter to her ADHD Dr appt before her talk therapy appointment…and then after dinner tomorrow night I am hitting the gym to work-out the frustrations and anxiety of the day while “clanging and banging” on the irons (Thanks Rock for that cute phrase) in hopes of sweating away the anxiety…

On Friday I worked at home so I could go to a job fair at our local technical college – spoke with several recruiters and picked up 4-5 business cards and was told to go to this or that website to fill out an application…spent Saturday evening doing just that.  I think the one that might scare me the most was when I went to the State’s Website and filled out an application to be…hold on…I’m gonna tell…a Corrections Officer…THAT scares the ever living you know what out of me…the COPAT (or physical exam) doesn’t intimidate me as much as the fact that IF hired I’d be working in a prison…never having actually set food inside one – yeah that frightens me.  Otherwise, I found the job fair itself pretty useless..it was more about networking and putting faces with companies than anything else.  I had ZERO clue how to even initiate conversation let alone get information.  So we’ll see.

Other than that I am high anxiety right now…

Can I just ditch the laptop, badge and parking pass? And go right to my severance and stay home?

No! DAMN!

Being an Adult SUCKS!

Good Morning Kids!

Another day in the trenches here…seriously getting to the point I want to just bail…

Why?

Simple – my replacement hasn’t officially started yet?!? Meaning she’s in office in Tampa BUT her background hasn’t cleared YET and she’s unable to come to site for her training…um WTF??! So I send my boss an email last Friday getting all the pertinent info together, find out her background is still pending and that they’ll need me to stay until 10/9! Um WTF?!?! I told them I’d need to think about it – told HR this morning I’m ok with staying until 10/9 but at that point my obligation to the company ends.  So now my replacement will be here next week for training and I am expected to plaster on a smile and pretend all is right with the world…which we all know is NOT the case!

Then the icing on the cake – boss lady asks me to request my replacement’s access to all of the systems I use…um talk about a SMACK in the face! Ugh…no class I swear! Sent the following the HR this morning:

Good Morning HR Manager –

Just checking in  – Boss Lady’s asked me to stay until 10/9, which I am ok with, not 100% ok, but ok.

Also, I understand the need to get my replacement up and running as soon as possible, but yesterday Kim was asking me to request her accesses to the XX Systems – frankly I feel like that’s a huge slap in the face.  I already am unsure about how I am handling things emotionally, but to do that is just one step too far.

I will say this, 10/9 is my absolute last day.  I don’t feel I owe anything to Company past that point.  I am also telling potential employers my 1st available day will be 10/11, and that’s been a bit of a stretch as is.

Thanks!

She responded that she’d look into it…AND she sent me the info on the career connection people I can talk to about a transition – looked at the website/registered/they are confirming eligibility but it just seems that looking for a job these days is more about how you can out-do your competition vs. who is the best eligible employee for the position…I am NOT one who uses LinkedIn and this place is PUSHING it seriously!  Seriously they want you to list accomplishments on your resume and anyone who is anyone knows Admin’s very RARELY have any serious accomplishments outside of streamlining systems and processes we can list.  So I have ZERO because at every turn my company has fought anything I wanted to suggest, thus NO accomplishments.

I am thinking this transition will be more getting myself out of the Corporate world and into something I want to do vs. need.  If that makes sense, I really am getting sick of sitting at a desk all damn day and reporting to some boss and company who could frankly care less about me a person and an employee…so I’ll be doing some serious thinking over the coming weeks to try and figure out how I can make money, support my clan, and still do what I want.

Can we tell I am feeling really down on myself?!?!

Only uplift in my life right now is that my workouts are rocking! I’ve been able to increase the weight I lift all around and my Crochet stuff has improved vastly…seriously check out some of my recent work here: YarntoAfghanCreations.

Can I go home and hide now?

So here we are, roughly 21-Days until Unemployment begins.

Motivation is seriously waning…I have no desire to actually do my job…and the very idea of training my replacement next week is making me sick.

I’d rather be at home working on any one of the numerous crochet projects I have going on right now than sitting here counting down the minutes until I am unemployed.

It doesn’t help that my co-workers are treating me like some Plague infested Pariah…they won’t talk to me, make eye contact, or even acknowledge I am here unless we cross paths in the hallway…I send them emails and they are ignored…I try to ask questions and I get no response…talk about un-professional.

Can I just duck behind a wall and hide?

Right now I’ve applied to roughly 1-2 jobs a day, I am being very picky about what kinds of jobs I am applying for, finding most of the jobs with either the State or County…you know those jobs you apply for and they go into a database and you never really hear from anyone, yet somehow people get hired…yeah those jobs…not sure who I have to screw or know to get a job in this town, but it’s going to be a very long road to re-employment.

Emotionally I am all over the map, I get excited about going home at night, getting my coffee on board, getting dinner and either parking my butt in my chair with a crochet project or heading to the gym…sad right? Once upon a time I actually liked my job and would be happy to come to work…not anymore, oh gee I wonder why!

Anyhew, that’s where I am with that…my Etsy shop is not overly busy, but I am getting continuous orders through Facebook from friends and family, right now I am working on a baby blanket/hat/surprise for a friend’s upcoming grand baby, and then another friend has ordered two stuffed animals, an Elephant and a Panda Bear.  All the while I have been working on a Crochet-A-Long of Christmas squares with the girls in the Repeat-Crafter-Me Facebook Group.

So If You want to Get Your Own Crochet Creation, Come See me at my Shop! Get ahead of the Christmas Crowds!

Yarn to Afghan Creations (1)

So where are with with the modification…as of right now STUCK…what I mean is simple, Citi sent us a letter stating they can’t approve us for a general modification due to our financial documents we’d never be able to re-pay the arrears, which are in the 5-Figures right now…yes we’re that far behind guys…and that we can be approved/set-up for a FHA Making Home Affordable something or other, but we’re waiting for a letter to arrive for that – when my hubby called last week or the week before about it our “counselor” told us that the letter hadn’t even been sent – there was a deadline date of 10-09-14 on the original letter…so where does that leave us? Currently in limbo.  I’ve been looking at rentals in our area, but there’s nothing we can reasonably afford that’ll accept our animals – and um yeah Giving them up is JUST NOT an Option! We’re not that kind of family…we’ll keep looking until we find somewhere where we can take them all (all SIX of them!) – the only remotely decent thing I’ve found is a 4-Bedroom house out in  town called Delco, which is about 30-Mins West of where we are currently located and about 45-Mins from where I work…while not ideal, if push came to shove that would be an option…then again I am willing to bet it’s been rented by now – so we keep our eyes out and see what life brings our way…

So what else?

Well a thought occurred to me over the weekend, and why I didn’t think of this sooner I’ll never know – but there’s all this news of pushing the minimum wage rate to $15.00/hour – which to me seems a bit extreme, but whatever – it finally dawned on me that $15.00/hour is MY SALARY! So if this minimum wage thing passes I’ll basically be making Minimum Wage…uh Hells NO! Ugh seriously need to fix this…YES I’ve been looking for work…NO I haven’t had a single interview…NO I have zero clue why…I am curious though as to what in the world we’re being set-up for.  My hubby just started working as a groomer (he’s still in his 8-Week 100-Dog Training Period) and will be making more money, but why in the world is it that I am “stuck” – I have a few ideas lined up in my head, it’s just a matter of making them become reality…so with that I am going to add in the below.

Now for anyone who has stuck around my blogs for any length of time will know that I am a TOTAL sucker for all things Nickelback – and when I heard they were releasing a new album, well you know I have been all over that…however, as per usual Chad’s got a message to share be it Political (as is evidenced in the 1st single off the album, Edge of a Revolution) or motivational, as is the case with the below, ‘What are You Waiting for?’ I hear this and think to myself that it’s time to move forward and time to get my arse moving!

So then this all begs the question of Where in the World did things go askew for me??? My financial life has been a royal friggin roller coaster since I moved out of my parents house back in the summer of 2000…what is it that I am missing? I have a wonderful husband whom I adore, two beautiful children and yet we continue to struggle – when are we going to get our release? When are we going to finally be in a settled situation?  Ugh frustration is running rampant here, can’t you tell?